Thursday, 6 February 2014

The real arguments against Scottish independence

“They” haven’t been telling you what the real arguments are against Scottish independence. “They” have been keeping quiet about them, not wanting you to know. Well there’s no omerta here, not on this blog,  no sir-ee*.

So here they are, these are the real deal, raw and uncut reasons why”they” won’t vote for Scottish independence:

1)      Can’t be arsed
2)      Anyway, have you no seen that shower up in Holyrood?
3)      Besides, see that Alex Salmond, I don’t trust him

And now they’re out in the open, its easy to point out why each one is largely pants.

Take (1), which cuts both ways. Looking over Hadrian’s wall does anyone actually think the UK civil service, politicians or what have you can actually be arsed with all the logistics and negotiations Scottish independence would entail? Like take the nuclear bombs currently stored in Scotland, do you actually think anyone in England can be arsed with storing them given all the construction, protests, planning permission disputes and what no doing so would generate? No me neither and that’s before you’ve started talking about the easy stuff like who get’s what embassy (bagsie Paris for Scotland). Except, from a Scottish perspective this isn't a reason to vote no.

(1) also applies this side of Hadrian’s wall and can be approached via a hypothetical conversation between a dad and his son: “So dad, why did you vote against Scottish independence (assuming you even bothered to vote), why did you commit me to however many more years of masochistic austerity measures used to pay for tax cuts for the rich, why did you want me to live in a Britain where Daily Mail headlines influence education policy, UKIP immigration policy and London & the S. East pretty much everything else government does?” Well son, it’s because I couldn’t be arsed”.

      Re: 2) you’ll get no argument here that that shower up in Holyrood is anything, but a shower. But,
          staying  in the Union won’t change that whereas leaving it will if only because cutting the Westminster  
          escape route will, at the very least, force our existing politicians to compete harder for fewer seats.

3)    I don’t get the down on Alex Salmond being too vain and sleekit personally, I mean Idi Amin is already the King of Scotland, whereas Alex Salmond is just a politician and politicians say what they think the electorate wants to hear. But, anyhoo, as the Labour Party in Scotland’s gradual decline into opposition makes clear, the story of devolution is also the story of how the Scottish electorate can’t be taken for granted; if Alex really is such a bam, then chances are he’ll lose/get turfed out via the wonders of democracy.

* Making these arguments a serious part of the mainstream debate would risk highlighting the apathetic and ignorant nature of much of the electorate, the utter mediocrity of Scottish political life and an associated fixation with the personal that’s trivial even by Nick Robinson standards.

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